J.D. Moyer is a science fiction author and electronic music producer from Oakland, California.
Maximize your sound … and everything else.
I first became familiar with the term maximizer from Penelope Trunk’s blog. According to Trunk, a maximizer always wants the best, and spends a great deal of time and energy trying to make the best decisions, acquire the best things, and have the best life. Maximizers are competitive, ambitious, and according to Trunk, have more interesting lives.
No half measures.
I deleted my Reddit and Facebook accounts back in July and August respectively. I quit Reddit because they don’t do enough to fight blatant racism and misogyny. Also I was wasting too much time on the site. Thirdly, I found that the anonymity often encouraged mean or disparaging comments (though, to be fair, there were just as many clever, helpful, and/or friendly comments).
I quit Facebook because 1) I was seeing too many posts from random people I didn’t know, 2) my time on the site wasn’t strengthening or enhancing the relationships I cared about most, and 3) I wasn’t enjoying time on the site. Also because of various privacy violations.
So I went cold turkey. Nuke option in both cases, account deleted, no going back (unless, of course, I decided to go back and start from zero karma and zero friends, respectively).
Thanks Fiat! You were great (except for the falling-off hubcap and bumpy passenger ride).
In a few months we’re coming to the end of our lease on the Fiat 500 (our family’s only car) and we’re committing to getting around for at least one month without owning or leasing another car. We’re considering using any and all of the alternatives below:
Transportation challenges will include visiting friends in Marin (difficult to get to via public transport) and Santa Cruz, transporting groceries and other bulky/heavy purchases, dropping off/picking up our daughter at play dates and time with her grandparents, getting to Golden Gate Park in San Francisco (challenging even with a car) and client visits all over the Bay Area. While in some cases we’ll solve transportation dilemmas by having things delivered, meeting online, etc., in most cases we’re planning to take the challenges head-on: how to do we physically get ourselves and our things from one place to another without owning or renting a car?
There are many advantages to getting rich slowly.
Today’s topic is how to get rich slowly, with a little help from Google Sheets.
Why write this post? In college I was just starting to save money from my part-time jobs, but I had no idea what to do with my savings. My parents had some savings and property assets, but no positions in the stock market or bonds, and nothing approaching an investment portfolio. I had no advice from them, nor did I know which questions to ask.
Rescue: specific, well-defined, limited help
Yesterday I received an angry email from a reader that gave me pause for thought. The reader asked me to do something I wasn’t comfortable doing and I declined. The reader became frustrated and let me know in no uncertain terms. Their argument went something like this: Why was I presenting myself as someone helpful if I wasn’t willing to help them?
It wasn’t a terrible interaction — just a frustrated person venting — but it did get me thinking about what I’m trying to do here. This blog is subtitled “Systems for Living Well” and that’s mostly what it’s about. I share my own experiences, insights, and knowledge, and hope this blog benefits others. In the past I’ve framed that as “helping people.”
But I’m wondering if “helping” people often leads to dysfunction and codependence. How much responsibility should the “helper” take for the circumstances of the “helped”? Is there a danger of the person being helped surrendering their own power and agency to the helper?
“Helping people” has been a core value of mine since grade school. To reevaluate and possibly jettison this guiding principle is a big deal for me. It’s not that I want to become less altruistic or less giving (especially in relation to friends and family), but I think the old language doesn’t work anymore. I need to replace “helping” with more specific verbs, in both my thinking process and in terms of real life actions.
Some thoughts re: the future direction of this blog:
What I Want to Retain or Move Towards
What I Want to Move Away From
I’m thinking out loud here. I don’t want to be less generous just because a few people feel overly entitled. I have no problem setting limits. Still, I may need to be clearer about what I’m offering, and where those limits are.
I hope you found this post educational, inspiring, or at least mildly entertaining!
Powered by WordPress & Theme by Anders Norén